How I met my other half Part 2 The Proposal.
So you've heard about how Stan and I met. When I moved to Surrey and became JK's bridesmaid and Stan was PT's Best man. Our first date was to a pub in Richmond and then the next day I was taken to meet his mother as it was her birthday. They seemed to like me. Soon Stan and I were seeing each other regularly, I'd spend time at his house in Reigate and he'd come to Richmond and stay with me. We'd both visit PT & JT every Sunday evening for a drink as Stan had always done. Because they were now married PT was determined that Stan should get married too, so on New Years Eve of that same year after their wedding, we were all at a party celebrating the New Year, when suddenly PT leaned across to Stan and said " Have you asked her to marry you yet?" To which he replied "No, not yet" and PT said "Well are you going to?" and Stan said "Er, yes, I s'ppose so", then PT learnt over to me and said "Stan 's got something to say......" to which Stan shifted slightly in his seat, he was rather drunk and leant over to me and said " Er Well Will you marry me?". I was to say the least dumbfounded, but rather stupidly , as I should have given it a lot of thought said "Yes".
PT jumps up and shouts to the bar man, "These 2 have just got engaged!!", The Bar man hurried over with a bottle of Champagne, Then they started playing some music and wanted us to dance, and join in with some game.Suddenly Stan was gone.........................................................
You would have thought he could stay to celebrate his own engagement but no, it was all too much, he drove off into the night and didn't come back for several hours.
I was beside myself with worry, he'd been drinking and could have had an accident. But he did eventually come back and I wondered if it had all been a dreadful mistake. He wasn't ready to propose, he only did it because of PT. But in the cold light of day we talked it through and agreed it was what we both wanted. We married 13 months later, tried for Valentines day but had to make do with 21 February! It was a very small wedding because Stan couldn't face a big do with lots of people looking at him, so closest family and PT & JT that was all.
It wasn't all plain sailing as we had to endure one of Stan's ex's constant bombardment of telephone calls day and night, usually when she was drunk, begging Stan to go and see her. This went on for several years. Even when we moved house she found us, thanks to the lodgers in our old house telling her the new number.
Sometimes he'd talk to her , sometimes he'd not, I used to get so cross.
But I had my own issues still as I was still very attached to Sam, (See much earlier blogs) and couldn't get him out of my mind and really felt I had been wrong to get married so quickly. But Sam was 500 miles away in Scotland and my life was here. So I just had to get on with it.
After we'd been married 6 months I decided I wanted a baby. Stan didn't. However, I got pregnant and Emma was born on June 21 1987, so she is 21 this weekend. I endured Stan's annoyance throughout the pregnancy. He felt we'd never be able to go to the pub again and I was ruining his life. Turned out we were in the pub as I went into labour and we were back in the pub 5 dayslater with baby Emma. It took a while but Stan got to love having children, so much so that he wanted to go on to have number
4, I said no more after number 3. Couldn't face another stint of post natal depression.
So here we are 22 years married and about to celebrate our eldest's 21st and middle daughter's 18th on 21st and 22 June! How about that?
12 comments:
Well you obviously did something right! It isn't the most romantic proposal in the world but the fact that you love each other and have stuck through it is all that matters. Thanks for sharing it.
CJ xx
Its funny how things turn out, its never quite as we think it will be but you seem very happy. You seem to have had a lot to endure together but it was clearly the right thing to do to say "Yes".
Blossom
Nice story, thanks for sharing with us.
I am glad to hear of someone else who had a less than romantic proposal, mine was in a carpark, not quite how I had imangined it would be. Like you though it hasn't done us any harm we have managed 24years so far.
Now you 've got me intrigued Fern, may not be romantic in a car park, but do tell how it came about!
Well yours is a real life romance with all its up and downs and realities . . . but you are still together and still celebrating.
I afraid there isn't an interesting story attached like yours.
We were having an almighty row in a carpark and he just lobbed the proposal into the proceedings, probably to shut me up and it certainly did take the wind out of my sails but being the kind, forgiving type, I still made him wait for a week for my answer! :-)
Good for you Fern.
Not good to make decision in the middle of a row!
You obviously made the right decision!
That proposal sounds about as romantic as mine was 16 years ago. We're still together too but I don't think Disney will be making the film version. Well done! blogthatmamax
This was a great post. I think it is important to demonstrate that relationships work, not simply because they are wonderfully easy and perfect but becuase the people involved WANT to make them work.
It's not the circumstances of the proposal that matter, it's what happens afterwards. Your relationship has obviously stood the test of time which is what really counts. And a very happy birthday to your two lovely daughters this weekend.
You have obviously made the right choice Muddie, you were made for each other.
Wish my HL was romantic though, it was me that had to do all the bookings for wedding.
xx
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